Hey guys!
So, I've been thinking about this topic alot lately. One of my friends recently found out that her parents are getting divorced, and even though she's putting on a happy face, I can tell that it's not easy for her. First of all, I want to say that if your parents are divorced, or if you know of people that are divorced,I'm here for you. My prayers are with you. I personally don't know why it's like, because my parents are still together which I am ABOVE and BEYOND thankful for, but instead of showing you empathy I can show you sympathy. If you would like to message me, send me a comment first and then email me at my email at the top of the screen. I don't check that email often, so comment me first so I know you're emailing.
SO. On to the dicussion. Divorce. It's an ugly word, isn't it? It sounds so harsh and cold and just there. You may be thinking, my parents are still together, why do I have to read this? I'm telling you now, you don't have to. It's not a topic that's aimed at everyone. BUT. Everyone can learn about it so you won't make the same mistakes if you choose to get married, or you can help out a friend who's watching their parents going through a divorce. I've got a shocking statistic for you guys. About 48% of marriages in Canada end in divorce. That means that about 1 out of every 2 couples will get divorced. For me, that brings tears to my eyes. Everyone invisions their wedding as the happiest day of their life. It's a beginning to the new journey you're starting with your significant other. But, for 1 out of 2 of those couples, the happiest day of their life will eventually end in sadness, anger of betrayal.
For me, I'm finding that divorces are becoming more and more common with my friends parents. Like I said earlier, I'm so thankful that my parents are still together. I've got some advice and some stuff to think about for everyone here. Whether your parents are going through a divorce, they've already gone through one, or you're helping someone else cope, I hope this helps.
1. It was their decision. They are the adults in this equation, and even though their idea may seem stupid, crazy and totally unacceptable, they're doing what they believe is best for them and for YOU. I don't think any parents would intentionally want to hurt their kids.
2. There are SO MANY other teens going through the same thing. It may feel like you're the only one, but there are tons of others going through the same thing.
3. Talking about it does help. Going to a pyschologist was one of the best things I've ever decided to do. I think alot of the time, we get pyschologists and pyschiatrists mixed up with people that want to butt into our lives and take over, but that's not the case. They're there to listen to every word that comes out of your mouth. They're there to give you advice, to watch you grow and to help you. Your guidance counsellor can do the exact same thing for you.
Everything is totally confidential EXCEPT if you tell them something threatening to your life i.e contemplating suicide. Then they're permitted by law to tell someone who can help.
4. Never be afraid to cry or be emotional. It's okay! I promise. Letting it out can be one of the best things.
5. The people that ask questions may get annoying and you may come to the point where you want to rip their heads off, but nine times out of ten, I believe that people are either curious, want to help or want to offer you advice.
6. God is THERE. He's right there with you, every step of the way. If all you can do is cry and you can't even speak, that's fine. Lift that up to God. He can take all of that and more.
NOW. Alot of this advice goes for other things too. I think everything other than number one can be related to frequent problems in our lives, like break ups or fights with friends. I hope that those of you that can relate to these things and get something out of it. I'm not a professional. I'm going off my feelings, advice from others and what I believe in my heart.
I feel for all of you out there that are hurting, confused or sad. I'm here. I may not be much help, but I'll listen. This website it as AWESOME website for divorce stats. http://www.divorcerate.org/divorce-rates-in-canada.html
Happy Wednesday guys.
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